Balance and Buffer

Birthdays can be filled with great expectations only to be met with disappointments, or no expectations and be pleasantly surprised. For me, the best thing to do is to keep a balance and a buffer.

Having a balance is far more important for me today than before when it was very easy to bounce back if I made a mistake, tripped over or ate the wrong thing. Everything from the bones to the bank account is no longer supple and growing.

By the way, growing old is not the right term for ageing. If we were to compare light and dark – light exists; dark does not. Dark is just the absence of light. Similarly, ageing is the absence of growing.

Because ageing happens so gently, we don’t feel it on a daily basis unless illness strikes. So we continue to live like we are in our twenties when we are already in our fifties.

Many years ago, I read Bill Cosby’s “Time Flies” which is a candid look at ageing when Bill was 50 years old. It was a book of things to come of us – battling with fading youth vitality, white hair sprouting, empty nests syndrome, fears of redundancy, and the list goes on. It wasn’t all that bad. Bill wrote about ageing pains in his comical and light-hearted way. He is now 75 and I believe still living an active purposeful life.

It is a survival skill to balance life’s challenging moments by looking at the lighter and brighter side of what’s happening to and around us. Even if the problem doesn’t go away, the negative feelings will and that makes a difference in how we spend our days.

I have to keep reminding myself everyday to balance my life. Have a balanced diet, balance work and social, sufficient exercise and rest, practise frugality and occasional indulgence, stay in touch with old friends and make new ones, keep a close eye on my son but give him the space to develop, and just about everything in life needs balancing. It’s a diversity of sorts and that can be very liberating.

Balance needs a buffer. Balancing is an act and can be difficult to achieve on its own. What I mean is that even though I plan to balance my life, things may not work out according to plans. We need a contingency plan, a buffer to cushion the hard emotional landings that may come our way whether we like it or not. Buffers are especially useful on your important days.

Talking about important days –

Every birthday, I have a buffer plan in case I don’t get that big surprise party or song dedication on radio. This year, my buffer plan was to start this blog. Starting is not difficult. Sustaining is the tricky part. I plan to write daily except Sunday which will be a rest day and time for research and planning for the week.

As I am writing this, Gold90.5 plays “Life Story” by Dick Lee,  Singapore’s talented baby boomer. How appropriate! Found a youtube version with nice clips of old Singapore which kind of sums up my birthday blog. So I did get my song dedication after all.

Hope you enjoy the song and the day.



6 thoughts on “Balance and Buffer

  1. Nice piece Joan…you do write well and makes easy reading too. Oh…”on aging is the absence of growing”…quite true but the problem is we grow other things (“so not quite absence”) ….”things” that we don’t want nor need. Think of it…when we were younger, we simply want to grow to look…, to be…, to feel…. Now, we wish we don’t grow anything the body don’t need or can do without…

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